I don’t ever remember it being this cold in my lifetime. There are places that freeze on me when I’m outside that I didn’t know I owned.

In NE Ohio, it’s -9 degrees with the wind chill making it feel like (and how it feels is very important) -36 degrees.

-36. Negative. Thirty. Six.

That’s 68 degrees below freezing point.  There should be a name for that…like “OMGIC!” (Oh My God, It’s Cold!).

I’m sure there are many people who scoff at my idea of cold as they run naked through -50 below wintry woods to dive into an ice hole to swim. And yes, I know my grandma walked uphill 27 miles in the snow one way to school every day, but to this Who, it’s terrible.

Before I drove Mr. Who home from the hospital last night, as he has a nasty flu but got Vicodin at the ER, so it was worth the trip, we held our breath and bravely strode the whole 10 feet to my car in the biting cold. It felt like a victory to jump into that icy minivan. We would have fist bumped had we not been afraid our knuckles would chip into ice pieces.

I told him I don’t think I could survive an Ice Age. He agreed. I’m that fragile and delicate.  Plus, I don’t remember seeing any wooly mammoths at the pet store. Everyone needs one of those to survive an Ice Age.

Or a tauntaun.

If you got that, you’re a huge nerd, and I love you.

One of my favorite movies is “The Day After Tomorrow” with the dashing Jake Gillen…Jake Gylan…Jellin’…gah…Brokeback Mountain/Prince of Persia guy.  The LA tornado scene was awesome, and I used that in my classroom a few times for weather examples, while scaring the crap out of my students.  But it was about another Ice Age.

How would anyone survive? It’s bad enough to think about a world with no power like “Revolution”, or a world with no power and Zombies, like “The Walking Dead”. Imagine if we added ice to that. We would have walking popsicles trying to eat us.

I don’t want to go like that.

I also don’t want to die from a Sharknado, but I’m safe from that for now.

I told Mr. Who I am going to stop shaving my legs so I can start to build up a nice pelt.  His mouth said: “ok” but his eyes said: “oh, lord, please don’t let that quarter Italian wife of mine stop shaving”.

That whole quarter is going to keep me warm.

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